*long sigh….*teary eyes

Masih dalam rangka rindu female companion. Sumpah deh eike baru sadar kalo hidup sehari2ku ini dikelilingi pria. Mulai dari pakne dan tole dirumah sampe anak2 alay di kantor semua kaum adam. Selebihnya kolega cewek beda ruangan yang seruangan cuma buibu2 sepuh :p, selebihnya di onlen doang……oh noooo girlfriend shortage alert!

Aku rindu si tomboy yang jago masak ngaco (salad apel+tuna??), rindu dengen celetukan2 sinisnya untuk segala sesuatu (mulai dari paprika sampe sopir taksi), rindu blusukan ke pasar beli bahan2 ga penting, rindu dengan selera makanya yang menyenangkan tapi kadang pilih2. Bahkan aku rindu kesotoy-an nya

Aku rindu si momma yang teduh dan menenangkan. Rindu pertanyaan2nya yang menyelidik, rindu judgement2nya yang tepat, rindu dengan curhatan dia yang terselubung, rindu nasehat2 fashionnya

Aku rindu si plegmatis yang mau aja digeret kemana2, makan sembarang kalir, nongkrong sak panggon2, gemes pengen mempraktekkan tips2 make-up yang baru kupelajari, rindu curhat sampe bibir dower, ketawa sampe tenggorokan kering, nonton pilem sambil dibahas dan diperdebatkan ga penting

Aku rindu ex-teman-sebelah-meja. Astaga aku minoritas sekali disini, aku rindu nggosipin orang kantor, rindu mbahas kehidupan cleblog, rindu tuker2an gosip artis, rindu mbahas serial tipi kabel, rindu maen game bareng, pengen jajan di kantin bareng, pengen karokean bareng, pengen tuker2an info make up dan sale2 di mall.

Aku rindu si gokil, yang sayangnya sekarang udah lebih kalem dan jaim. Aku rindu tawa ngakaknya, rindu celetukan ngaconya, rindu tingkah2 slengekannya, sedikit rindu dengan ceramah2 idealisnya, rindu membahas buku, relationship, filem dan masa lalu bersama.

Aku rindu si bossy yang sudah entah berada dimana (aku tau sih dia dimana, tapi kayak ga mungkin bisa ketemu lagi gitu). Sumpah aku kangen muka asemnya itu, tapi mostly aku kangen gosip2nya yang selalu spektakuler (mulai dari artis sampe temen smp), rindu curhat tanpa dihakimi, rindu bernostalgia tentang masa lalu, rindu njajan without boundaries, bahkan aku rindu cerita pamer2nya. sumpah been ages…..and I don’t know if we still connect like we used to ;'(

Kalo boleh aku punya permintaan pada Dibo the Gift Dragon (disney junior alert!) aku ingin punya satu hari penuh bersama masing-masing dari mereka just do nothing and do anything, mulai dari cari2 bahan obrolan sampe kehabisan bahan obrolan. Mulai dari jaim2an sampe bosen berduaan.  Mulai dari laper sampe mual liat makanan. Pokoknya  sampe eneg dan sampe pengen cepet2 pisahan dan kangen2an lagi. Pokoknya sampe overdosed!

Stag of Brownies

Oh how I realized that they are a part of my life, they are a part of me. To imagine that we are not what we used to be is like a stab in the bone. Life changes, people comes and goes but bestfriends, they shouldn’t be apart. They are the cherry on top of my cake of life.


Brake Those Marriage Rules!

And i thought I was the only one with this thought, and I am weird, and I have problem, and my marriage is unusual….turned out that those rules are absurd and there’s no such thing as a marriage rule other than those that you created with your partner….

10 Marriage Rules You Should Break

Forget age-old axioms for long-term wedded bliss

By Denise Schipani

The two of you should do everything together; work out every disagreement (without actually fighting); spend every night in the same bed; and never, ever be bored. Say what?! These and other so-called “rules” for marriage need some serious debunking. And it’s not just because rules your mother may have passed on are outdated; some may be downright damaging. In fact, “breaking some marriage ‘rules’ may be the best thing you can do for your relationship,” says Barbara Bartlein, RN, MSW, psychotherapist and author of Why Did I Marry You Anyway? Here are 10 rules you can break with confidence.

1. Never go to bed angry.
Where did this one come from? Turns out, it may go as far back as the Bible, which advises not letting the sun go down on your anger. But trying to work through a problem when you’re tired and stressed won’t get you anywhere, says Elizabeth Lombardo, PhD, psychologist and author of A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription for Happiness. “Agree to disagree for now, and to revisit the issue when you’re rested.”

2. Always be 100% honest.
In marriage, no-holds-barred honesty is not always the best policy. For example, “you don’t need to share details of past relationships,” says Bartlein. “That invites comparisons, and when you compare, someone comes up short.” The bottom line: You need to be polite and caring when it comes to your partner’s feelings.

3. Never vacation without each other.
The received wisdom here is that if you have time off from your jobs and lives, you should naturally prefer to spend it together. One problem with this rule is that you and your spouse may not have the same definition of a great getaway (you like to ski, he’s a beach bum). The other danger, says Dr. Lombardo, is the belief “that you have to be each other’s everything, and that’s just not realistic.” Sometimes, you need a spa weekend, and he may want to go camping (or vice versa). Just be sure that you don’t always take off without each other.

4. If you fight, you’re headed for divorce.
Actually, says Bartlein, research shows that couples who never fight—assuming that means they’re holding back to avoid conflict—are more likely to split. You need to find ways to fight healthily and productively (without blaming, name-calling and the like), but that said, being committed to respectfully airing out conflicts is a far better rule than “keep your mouth shut.”

5. Once you have children, they come first.
“So often, I see couples who have put their relationship on hold in order to be good parents,” says Dr. Lombardo. But those couples, she says, have it exactly backward. Making your relationship top priority is better not just for you, but for your children, who need to see you in charge and who feel safer and more secure with parents who have a loving relationship. “Create couple-only time during which you do not discuss bills or children, where you do fun activities and enjoy each other’s company.” The kids’ll be all right.

6. You should never sleep in separate beds.
Um, snore much? It’s a myth that couples always sleep better and more cozily together than apart. One partner may be a toss-and-turner, or one may hit the hay early while the other keeps a reading light burning till the wee hours. So if one of you occasionally decamps to the guest room, don’t sweat it. “Getting a good night’s sleep is crucial to the health of your mind, body and marriage,” says Dr. Lombardo. Just be sure a separate-bed habit isn’t about avoiding sex or physical intimacy.

7. Partners should sync up their hobbies.
Though spending every free moment you have training for a marathon while your spouse works on his classic car isn’t good for your marriage, neither is subscribing to the notion you should quit doing what you love just because your husband doesn’t love the same things. Giving up your passions is akin to forgoing your independence, and “without independence in a marriage people feel trapped,” says Bartlein. Pursue your separate interests and find activities you both enjoy.

8. If there’s no spark, you’re doomed.
Many married couples understand intellectually that they won’t always experience that I’ve-been-drugged-by-love feeling in a long-term relationship. “But many still believe that when the spark dies out, it means they’re in the wrong relationship, and seek something new,” says Bartlein. Long-term relationships survive on commitment and trust, out of which grows love. The mistake here is to believe that you can live forever on fireworks, or even just love, alone.

9. Boring is bad.
The problem with this so-called rule, says Bartlein, is when couples confuse a calm, predictable union with a bad one. A drama-filled relationship may feel exciting, but in the long run it’s not likely to be healthy. Isn’t it better, she says, to “boringly” know where your spouse is every night than to be “excited” by constant ups and downs? “Better to have a safe, relaxed, ‘boring’ life together in the everyday. You can always inject excitement with vacations and activities.”

10. You should have sex with your partner to make him/her happy.
This may be a particular problem for women, especially new mothers. “Sex becomes yet another item on your to-do list, and you think you have to do it for the sake of your marriage, and the happiness of your spouse,” says Dr. Lombardo. While neither of those reasons is wrong, they shouldn’t be the only reasons. “Sex is for both of you.”

Read more: Marriage Rules – Best Marriage Rules and Advice to Break – Woman’s Day

Aduh si Taylor itu ya…..

Gaya banget deh, daripada nggosipin temen sendiri mendingan nggosipin artes deh. Dosanya sama aja sih, cuma kan lebih seru aja heheh.

Sebernya diriku bukan yang ‘tau’ banget soal Taylor Swift sih, bahkan suka lagunya juga baru2 aja. Taunya cuma dia musisi yang handal, bisa main musik, bikin lagu dan nyanyi dan langsung ngehits sampe dapet grammy berkali2. Terus karena dia mondar-mandir di media jadi sering liatin gaya baju dan dandannannya yang lucu2 dan cenderung manis dan sopan. I like it. Ditambah lagi beberapa foto dia hengot sama Selena Gomez dengan santai ke mall dan kafe2 jadi kebayang kalo si Taylor ini anaknya girly banget lah. Nggak sok tua dan ceria nampaknya. Thats all.

Sampai aku baca sebuah artikel yang membahas makna dan inspirasi dibalik lagu2nya, mulai dari album pertama sampe terbaru…..bok ternyata 7 dari 10 lagi itu semua curhat dan maki2 mantan2 pacarnya. Nggak ada yang salah sih menurutku, lagu mana sih di dunia ini yang nggak ngomongin masalah cinta dan putus cinta? ALL OF THEM ARE. Aku bahkan salut karena dia bisa mengungkapkan perasaannya begitu puitis dan indah dalam bentuk lagu yang enak didenger dan disukai banyak orang. Sementara kita paling banter nangis terus makan es krim segalon (oh gak ada yang kayak gitu ya?).


Dari situlah setelah ditelusuri aku baru tau kalo ternyata mantan2 pacar Taylor Swift itu artes papan atas semua. Gak ada kriteria tertentu sih, selain: BEKEN. Pacarnya mulai dari John Mayer, Joe Jonas, Taylor Lautner, Harry Styles, Jake Gyllenhall sampe Connor Kennedy yang disebut2 sebagai The Royal Family of America. But still, itu pun masih tergolong wajar menurutku, namanya juga seleb ya pacarannya sama seleb dong. Tapi media dan orang2 hollywood sana sudah kadung ngecap dia BOY CRAZY, sebuah predikat yang biasanya ditempelkan pada cewek yang terobsesi dengan cowok, menggilai dan memujanya.

Dalam sebuah interview Taylor pastinya menentang predikat itu dan membela diri dengan mengatakan bahwa sejak 2010 sampe sekarang dia cuma pacaran sama 2 cowok doang. ‘Nggak segitunya kalik’, mungkin gitu komentar Taylor kalo dia anak alay. Lagian lho Taylor ini udah umur 23 tahun, kalo dia ganti pacar nggak sampe setahun emang apa salahnya sih? Ya mungkin karena pacarnya orbek semua ya jadi sorotan medianya santer (ini yang pake kata ‘orbek’ dan ‘santer’ ini orang tahun brapa seh?).


Tapi kayaknya lebih dari itu deh, aku mendapat kesan kalo media ngecap dia Boy Crazy karena dia memang menampakkan tanda2 obsessive ya ceu. Dan itu semua ‘terpampang nyata’ di lirik2 lagunya, sepak terjang terbarunya yang terrekam media dan tingkahnya sendiri di muka publik. Misalnya nih yang paling banyak diomongin adalah sepak terjangnya saat pacaran dengan Conor Kenedy. Dia seperti berjuang abis2an untuk bisa masuk ke keluarga terhormat itu sampe2 dia sahabatan sama neneknya Conor, dateng ke Perancis saat ibunya Conor dapet award, dan jeng jeng…..beli rumah di sebelah rumah The Kennedy. Wah parah nih cewek. Itu duit 100an M enak banget keluarinnya demi deket rumah pacar.

Udah gitu pas putus sama Harry Styles katanya dia sampe nyewa hotel deket rumah Harry pas ada event di UK supaya bisa ketemuan lagi. Ditambah kelakuannya di Red Carpet dan Grammy yang menurut gw kurang classy deh. Kalo memang dia ga peduli lagi sama Harry kenapa dia mesti dandan super sexy di red carpet dan di panggung di UK? Terus nyindir2 Harry pas nyanyi di Grammy. Itu kan ‘ngetarani’ banget kalo dia masih mikirin dia dan masih sakit hati sama tuh cowok. Malahan menurut media dia dandan kayak gitu supaya bisa balikan sama Harry. Nah kan makin miring kan gosipnya. Itu karena kelakuan dia sendiri. Padahal deep down inside aku masih yakin dia cewek manis yang menyenangkan. Bahkan Harry bilang gitu saat ditanya pendapatnya tentang kelakuan Taylor, bah siapa yang gak dewasa nih.


Kirain cuma sampe segitu aja, ternyata baru2 ini muncul foto proses syuting video clip terbarunya Taylor dimana dia dandan mirip Harry dan mengulang adegan romantis mereka dengan teman2 ceweknya. Bukankah itu memperolok namanya? Kalo emang dia masih peduli sama Harry kenapa dia harus memperolok adegan romantis mereka. Bukankah itu saat2 yang intimate buat mereka. Haduh ga tau deh ya, mungkin Taylor is just another celeb lah ya yang kelakuannya diluar kebiasan orang biasa. Well with a million bucks in hand, why wouldn’t you.